Companion blog to The Social Poets for my favorite links:  coffee sites, favorite fellow poets, how to improve your writing and poetry, art,  educational links, social issues, social responsibility groups, politics, my Libation Friday! and Cheeky Quote Day! segments, Popular Posts on The Social Poets, Dennys Poems, word puzzle sites, music, cultural magazines, mountain climbing, music and travel.  

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Showing posts with label Cheeky Quote Day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cheeky Quote Day. Show all posts

30 December 2009

Funny New Years Quotes



From Denny: Here's a fun sampling of the funny quotes and more I posted about New Year's. For the full post, check out The Social Poets blog: Funny New Years Quotes, Smarter New Years Resolution Tips - Cheeky Quote Day! 29 Dec 2009.

New Years Quotes

* Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. - Bill Vaughan

* The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. - P. J. O'Rourke

* An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan

* May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions! - Joey Adams

* New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot! Unless, of course, those tests come back positive. - Jay Leno

New Year's Poem

Happy New Year!!

A New Years toast to love and laughter
and happily ever after

A health to you, a wealth to you,
And the best that life can give to you.

Dance as if no one were watching,
Sing as if no one were listening and
Live every day as if it were your last. - Anonymous

Funny New Year's Resolutions

* But can one still make resolutions when one is over forty? I live according to twenty-year old habits. - Andre Gide

* Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each New Year find you a better man. - Benjamin Franklin

* Your Merry Christmas may depend on what others do for you. But your Happy New Year depends on what you do for others. - Anonymous



*** For the full post, check out The Social Poets blog, Funny New Years Quotes, Smarter New Years Resolution Tips - Cheeky Quote Day! 29 Dec 2009.

*** ALSO: Rare Blue Moon Shines on New Years Eve, Origin of 6 Meanings

8 Easy Yummy New Years Recipes to Warm Your Guests

Fun Kid Recipes, Activities Keep Them Busy For Holidays


*** THANKS for visiting!

16 December 2009

Funny Christmas Quotes and More Holiday Fun

From Denny: Here's an excerpt and a sampling of this week's Cheeky Quote Day post over at my other humorous blog, The Social Poets, enjoy! Just so you won't miss out on more grins, there's a link at the end of this post to take you there. :)

5 Funny Christmas Quotes

* The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

* Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it. - Richard Lamm

* Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven. – W. C. Fields

* Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. – Johnny Carson

* Let me see if I've got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn't laundering illegal drug money? - Tom Armstrong

Funny Christmas Story

Saying the Holiday Prayer

A four-year-old boy who was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food.

He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited ... and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"

Then there's the "local" version of the famous Christmas classic "'Twas the Night Before Christmas."

The Night Before Christmas in Brooklyn, New York


'Twas the night before Christmas,
Da whole house was mella,
Not a creature was strirrin',
Cuz I had a gun unda da pilla.

When up on da roof
I heard somethin' pound,
I sprung to da window,
To scream, "YO! Keep it down!"

When what to my
Wanderin' eyes should appear,
But da Don of all elfs,
And eight friggin' reindeer!

Wit' slicked back black hair,
And a silk red suit,
Don Christopher wuz here,
And he brought da loot!

Wit' a slap to dare snouts
And a yank on dare manes,
He cursed and he shouted
And he called dem by name

"Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,
Yo Vinny, Yo Vito,
Ay Joey, Ay Paulie,
Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!"

As I drew out my gun
And hid by da bed,
He flew troo da winda
And slapped me 'side da head.

"What da hell you doin'
Pullin' a gun on da Don?
Now all you're gettin' is coal,
You friggin' moron!"

Den pointin' a fat finga
Right unda my nose,
He twisted his pinky ring,
And up da chimney he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh,
Obscenities screamin',
Away dey all flew,
Before he troo dem a beatin'.

Den I heard him yell out,
What I did least expect,
"Merry Friggin' Christmas to all,
And yous better show some respect!

- (Understandably) Anonymous

*** For the full post over at The Social Poets go check out The Funny Side of Christmas - Cheeky Quote Day! 16 Dec 2009

*** THANKS for visiting and have a great holiday!

25 November 2009

5 Funny Thanksgiving Quotes, Photos



Trash-talking turkeys just passing the time until someone took them seriously... Photo by stevevoght @ flickr from another of my funny posts: 21 Funny Thanksgiving Fighting Turkey Photos

From Denny: I found some hilarious Thanksgiving Day quotes along with a few smart jokes and LOL holiday poems for this week's Cheeky Quote Day over at The Social Poets blog. Click on the links below for the full post of funnies and the Obama Turkey Pardon Preparation Video. Here's a sampling taste to get you started on your holiday grinning, enjoy!

Quotes

* If you count all your assets, you always show a profit. ~ Robert Quillen

* Here I am 5 o'clock in the morning stuffing bread crumbs up a dead bird's butt. - Roseanne Barr

* It was dramatic to watch my grandmother decapitate a turkey with an ax the day before Thanksgiving. Nowadays the expense of hiring grandmothers for the ax work would probably qualify all turkeys so honored with 'gourmet' status. - Russell Baker

* Thanksgiving is America's national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. ~ Michael Dresser

* I love Thanksgiving turkey. It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. ~ Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger

*** For more funny holiday quotes, holiday jokes and hilarious poems, the Obama funny video about his first act of turkey pardoning (wonder if it's name is Cheney???) and great holiday recipe links, check out The Social Poets and Cheeky Quote Day, go here.

*** Thanks for visiting and come back often for a grin! :)

22 November 2009

All Cheeky Quote Day! Links to Posts



Photo by Tansan @ flickr

From Denny: Since I recently found out that Blogger does not back up anything but the blog posts I realized I'd better make posts out of all the sidebar links to ensure they are backed up! :) Plus this is easier to put into a Word document as backup too since the code is already written. In case of some unforseen catastrophic failure and the blog is lost all you have to do is copy and paste these links back into another post to rebuild the blog.

December

Fun and Quirky Time Wasters - Cheeky Quote Day! 9 Dec 2009

Funny Malapropisms - Cheeky Quote Day! 2 Dec 2009

November 2009

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes - Cheeky Quote Day! 25 Nov 2009

Funny Quotes About Reading Habits - Cheeky Quote Day! 18 Nov 2009

Funny Money Advice - Cheeky Quote Day! 11 Nov 2009

Ironic Grinners - Cheeky Quote Day! 4 Nov 2009

October 2009

Lampooning Perfectionists - Cheeky Quote Day 28 Oct 2009

35 Jay Leno Quotes for Cheeky Quote Day 21 October 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 14 October 2009 - Halloween Quotes

Cheeky Quote Day! 7 October 2009


September 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 30 September 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 23 September 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 16 September 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 9 September 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 2 September 2009

August 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 26 August 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 19 August 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 12 August 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 5 August 2009


July 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 29 July 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 22 July 2009 - funny jobs and unemployment quotes

Cheeky Quote Day! 15 July 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 8 July 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 1 July 2009


June 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 24 June 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 17 June 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 10 June 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 3 June 2009


May 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 27 May 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 20 May 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 13 May 2009


April 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 29 April 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 22 April 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 15 April 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 1 April 2009


March 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 25 March 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 18 March 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 11 March 2009

04 November 2009

6 Ironic Grinners! Cheeky Quote Day at The Social Poets - 4 Nov 2009



Ironic funny quotes comin' at ya, hard and fast! :)

From Denny: Found a lot of witty quotes for the Cheeky Quote Day! segment over at The Social Poets today! They will definitely get you thinking while you are laughing, a real two-fer to keep the brain cells in stellar fitness shape. :)

Witty quotes also make great writing prompts as they expose your mind to thinking about a subject from a different angle. Construct your own writing exercises for your blog or journal. Riffing off of quotes really does a lot to improve your writing. Give it a try and see for yourself!



Here are a few funny quotes for your tasty mind candy today (while you are detoxing from your Halloween candy high):

Quotes

* All my best thoughts were stolen by the ancients. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

* Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. - Aldous Huxley

* The sinning is the best part of repentance. - Arab Proverb

* Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same. - G.B. Shaw, "Maxims for Revolutionists," 1898

* It's pretty hard to be efficient without being obnoxious. - Kin Hubbard

* Is a stolen copyright a copywrong? – Anonymous

*** Thanks for visiting, much appreciated and come back often for a grin!

*** To get to Ironic Grinners - Cheeky Quote Day! 4 Nov 2009 - go here.

21 October 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! over at The Social Poets



*** Comedians like Jay Leno keep us laughing with a ready quip!

From Denny: In the mood for some hilarious Jay Leno quotes? Hike on over to The Social Poets for this week's Cheeky Quote Day! segment. If ever there is a cheeky guy Jay Leno is rated at the top.

For 35 Jay Leno Quotes, Cheeky Quote Day 21 October 2009, go here.

Here's a trio sampling:

* A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give people a sense of security. Oh yeah, what makes you feel more secure than sitting on a shotgun? Now how does this work? What's the first thing a thief steals? Your wallet, oh, now he's got your gun too!

* In California, 50 women protested the impending war with Iraq by lying on the ground naked and spelling out the word 'peace.' Right idea, wrong president. (George Bush was in office, not Bill Clinton.)

* Wait till these Enron guys find out that in prison, the term "Insider trading" has a whole new meaning.

*** Thanks for visiting!

For 35 Jay Leno Quotes, Cheeky Quote Day 21 October 2009, go here.

14 October 2009

Cheeky Quote Day at The Social Poets, Funny Halloween Animation



Halloween: the only time of the year we can get away with acting "socially inappropriate," i. e., obnoxious! :)

From Denny: Make sure you get your silly Halloween seasonal laughs today reading Cheeky Quote Day over at The Social Poets!

Thanks for visiting, everyone, really appreciate all the many visits every day and your support! Have a great day!

07 October 2009

Cheeky Quote Day! 7 October 2009



From Denny:
Sometimes, writing poetry feels like running full speed down the rabbit hole. It might account for why so many poets tend toward the morose: Whiners' Poetry. While I was researching funny quotes for this Cheeky Quote Day I was surprised at how few poets have much of a sense of humor. Can I tell you I did a lot of editing? Notably, some of my favorite poets like Robert Frost, Walt Whitman, Oscar Wilde and Carl Sandburg were brimming over with sarcastic funny one-liners.

It's OK to whine every now and then - but we writers need to keep in mind the well-being of the reader. Drowning in sadness rarely is a help to others. Defensive poets counter with they are only writing for themselves. Fine, then don't publish it; keep it to yourself. "Verses which do not teach men new and moving truths do not deserve to be read." - Voltaire. (A high standard but certainly worthy of a challenge to the writer; it only makes you a better writer.) When you write to publish, you establish a connection with your readers and owe them a valuable read. That is what builds community, you and the reader together.

There is this perception today that to write good poetry it has to be sad and mournful or ridiculously silly like for a children's rhyme. The best poets throughout history often struck a chord in the middle ground for the exploration of serious social issues and the human condition.

Serious subjects can reflect the sad, the intellectually indignant or the morally obscene perspective. It's also important to offer more to your reader. When you write think of different angles of the problem and wonder aloud about different solutions.

Many a poet has inspired world leaders to reconsider a policy position or expand their belief system. Many of our American Presidents have been strongly influenced by their favorite poets. "When power narrows the areas of a man's concerns, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence." - President John F.Kennedy

As you explore how to write your own poetry, consider challenging and expanding your own belief system. "Be the change in the world you wish to see." - Gandhi

Here's the best of what I gleaned for you to enjoy!



Photo of e. e. cummings blue bench - click on the Photo Credits link for more information and the poem written on the bench enlarged to read.

Quotes

* I could no more define poetry than a terrier can define a rat. - A. E. Housman

* I gave up on new poetry myself thirty years ago, when most of it began to read like coded messages passing between lonely aliens on a hostile world. - Russell Baker

* Poetry is the language in which man explores his own amazement. - Christopher Fry

* If Galileo had said in verse that the world moved, the Inquisition might have let him alone. - Thomas Hardy

* A poet is a man who puts up a ladder to a star and climbs it while playing a violin. - Edmond de Goncourt

A few cheeky poems:

Browsing the dim back corner
Of a musty antique shop
Opened an old book of poetry
Angels flew out from the pages
I caught the whiff of a soul
The ink seemed fresh as today
Was that voices whispering?
The tree of the paper still grows. - Pixie Foudre

If conditions aren't right
The poem won't come out
It will sit inside and stew
And emerge a different beast. - Ed Northstrum

Breathe-in experience,
breathe-out poetry. - Muriel Rukeyser

There is no happiness like mine.
I have been eating poetry. - Mark Strand, "Eating Poetry," Reasons for Moving, 1968

Quotes

* You will find poetry nowhere unless you bring some of it with you. – Joseph Joubert

* Science is for those who learn; poetry, for those who know. - Joseph Roux, Meditations of a Parish Priest

* Poetry is an echo, asking a shadow to dance. - Carl Sandburg

* The worst fate of a poet is to be admired without being understood. - Jean Cocteau, Le Rappel á l'ordre, 1926

* A poet's autobiography is his poetry. Anything else is just a footnote. - Yevgeny Yentushenko, The Sole Survivor, 1982

* Poets are like baseball pitchers. Both have their moments. The intervals are the tough things. - Robert Frost

* Like a piece of ice on a hot stove the poem must ride on its own melting. - Robert Frost

* A poet looks at the world the way a man looks at a woman. - Wallace Stevens, Opus Posthumous, 1957

* A sold poem loses half its meaning. - Glade Byron Addams

* Poetry is not a turning loose of emotion, but an escape from emotion; it is not the expression of personality, but an escape from personality. But, of course, only those who have personality and emotions know what it means to want to escape from these things. - T.S. Eliot, Tradition and the Individual Talent, 1919

* I would as soon write free verse as play tennis with the net down. - Robert Frost, 1935

* Poetry is not a civilizer, rather the reverse, for great poetry appeals to the most primitive instincts. - Robinson Jeffers

* When you read and understand a poem, comprehending its rich and formal meanings, then you master chaos a little. - Stephen Spender



* Poets are like magicians, searching for magical phrases to pull rabbits out of people's souls. - Glade Byron Addams

* It is a sad fact about our culture that a poet can earn much more money writing or talking about his art than he can by practicing it. - W.H. Auden

* To be a poet is a condition, not a profession. – Robert Frost

* No poems can please for long or live that are written by water-drinkers. - Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus), Satires

* A poet dares be just so clear and no clearer.... He unzips the veil from beauty, but does not remove it. A poet utterly clear is a trifle glaring. - E.B. White

* Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. - G.K. Chesterton

* A poet's work is to name the unnameable, to point at frauds, to take sides, start arguments, shape the world, and stop it going to sleep. - Salman Rushdie

* I've written some poetry I don't understand myself. - Carl Sandburg

* Poetry is a packsack of invisible keepsakes. - Carl Sandburg

* A poet can survive everything but a misprint. - Oscar Wilde

* Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world. - Percy Byshe Shelley



This photo has a great story from the photographer too, click on the Photo Credits link to read.

* The poet is a liar who always speaks the truth. - Jean Cocteau

* Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose-petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo. - Don Marquis

* Not everyone who drinks is a poet. Some of us drink because we're not poets. - Dudley Moore

* Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason. - Novalis

* Poets are literal-minded men who will squeeze a word till it hurts. - Archibald MacLeish

* Poets, we know, are terribly sensitive people, and in my observation one of the things they are most sensitive about is money. - Robert Penn Warren

* The phone rings and I curse. Literary editor. Seasonal verse. - Wendy Cope

* There is the view that poetry should improve your life. I think people confuse it with the Salvation Army. - John Ashbery

* To have great poets, there must be great audiences too. - Walt Whitman

* Written poetry is worth reading once, and then should be destroyed. Let the dead poets make way for others. Then we might even come to see that it is our veneration for what has already been created, however beautiful and valid it may be, that petrifies us. - Antonin Artaud

* You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone. - John Ciardi

* Poetry is what gets lost in translation. - Robert Frost

* Poetry is the journal of the sea animal living on land, wanting to fly in the air. Poetry is a search for syllables to shoot at the barriers of the unknown and the unknowable. Poetry is a phantom script telling how rainbows are made and why they go away. - Carl Sandburg, Poetry Considered

* Out of the quarrel with others we make rhetoric; out of the quarrel with ourselves we make poetry. - W.B. Yeats



And let the voices from our ancient world history have the last words:

* Poetry is nearer to vital truth than history. - Plato

* The distinction between historian and poet is not in the one writing prose and the other verse... the one describes the thing that has been, and the other a kind of thing that might be. Hence poetry is something more philosophic and of graver import than history, since its statements are of the nature rather of universals, whereas those of history are singulars. - Aristotle, On Poetics

***

Photo Credits

Photo of spiraling downward staircase - no attibution

Photo of e. e. cummings blue bench by Tony the Misfit @ flickr

Silent Dreams fog photo by Sudhamshu @ flickr

Poetry sign photo by jurvetson @ flickr

Photo of spiral hand, Fibonacci sequence, the Golden Mean by Use your Hands @ flickr

The Institution of Silly & Meaningless Sayings